I missed my Co-op!

David and I took a road trip to Idaho yesterday, so here I am in my favorite place in the world; the Co-op! There is something about the enviornment in the little cafe that makes you feel like you've come home to something. There is all sorts of good, happy energy here and the food is fantastic. Everything tastes better when you get it at the Co-op. I had a satsuma that was so sweet, it tasted like a piece of candy. I feel really lucky to be sitting here and eating such delicious food.

The other day, my sister and I were chatting on the phone about finances and life in general. She said, "You'll know when you've hit that point; when all the bills are paid, you can afford to eat and you still have a little left over". I am so ready for that comfortable place, when I can actually LIVE and not worry about having enough to cover basic expenses. There have been many times where I paid the phone bill instead of buying food. I've gotten used to scraping change off the ground, in hopes that if I do it enough, maybe there will be enough for something later. There was a time in October last year, when I was buying tortillas at the dollar store. Yes, it is cheaper to buy them at the regular grocery store, but when you only have a couple of dollars and you need to make it stretch, the dollar store seems like a good idea.
When we came back to Idaho, we were surprised at what we actually had left in our fridge. We couldn't believe that we were subsisting on literally nothing. Now I remember why I took that at-home teaching job. (Part of the deal was that I get a full meal.) In the fridge was literally the following: half a jar of jam, mustard, three dilapidated carrots, a bag of very old and hard tortillas, and a freezer full of lamb chops that I bought sometime at Safeway when they were cheap in bulk.
I remember the constant feeling of desperation when there wasn't enough to eat. I felt jealous and jaded that there were people who could afford to buy enough each week. I couldn't concentrate and there was nothing that I could do to lift us out of poverty, no matter how many odd jobs I took. My teaching salary was so minimal that it didn't even pay half the rent and I was supposed to be doing ONLY that. If they found out that I had two other jobs, I would have lost my funding.
Anyway, those experiences have given me a better understanding what many people are going through. Food insecurity is a real problem and when you don't have enough food, there is no amount of gumption that can pull you up by your bootstraps.

I think as a nation, we have taken much for granted.